The Eye of the Bedlam Bride — Chapter no 60

[ 60 ]

QUAN HAD MORE CRAP IN HIS INVENTORY THAN I DID, WHICH WAS SAYING a lot. He carried a ton of magical weapons, from swords to spears to war hammers to more non-traditional items, like a magical chainsaw and something that appeared to be a literal sock filled with nickels, only it was one of the highest value items he had on him. Also, there was a bowler hat like that guy had in that James Bond movie, where you could throw it, and it would decapitate someone before it boomeranged back to you. Donut was going to lose her mind when she saw it. He also held almost five million gold coins, and I wondered if he’d ever actually purchased anything. He had all this stuff he never used. It was going to take forever for me to go through all of this stuff. Thankfully, I could transfer it all with one button.

The only thing I left was the single, golden ring, which remained clutched

in his hand.

I kept his arm. I wasn’t sure why.

I didn’t turn back to Ren, but she warned I had to make myself clear of the building. Her magical wrist bracer was going to blow the place sky high.

That was okay. The building was useless to us now.

“Come on, Samantha,” I said as we walked outside into the burning city. I had toyed with the idea of pulling out my ring of Divine Suffering and marking Ren, or maybe Khulan, like I had with Miriam, but I didn’t have time. The mark took thirty seconds to form on this floor, and if either of them had a skill that let them know they’d been marked, it was possible they’d have a sudden change of heart about what they were doing. I didn’t want to complicate things further.

Still… I felt the urge to pull the ring out and slip it on. I fought it. On the next floor, the ring would have a new feature. I could mark as many people as I wanted at once. If we got out of here, that was where it was really going to come in handy.

In the distance, Amayon, the demon possessing the body of the Madre de Aguas snake sat atop a tall building, raised vertical like a spire, pouring fire into the sky like it was trying to burn its way upward. I had no idea what it was doing, but demon seagulls circled it like a tornado. It was probably casting a spell. Great. Just great. Red dots were everywhere.

I scooped up the red automaton and pulled it into my inventory and started jogging west, deeper into downtown Havana as the building behind me started to crumble.

Ren: Goodbye, everyone. At least I won’t have to listen to anyone butcher the pronunciation of my name anymore. Do me a favor, and fuck them up for me. Make them all pay.

And with that, there was a secondary rumbling behind me. It wasn’t a huge explosion, but it was enough. The dome top of the building collapsed in on itself, like it was a controlled detonation. The blast was small by my own standards. Mixed in with everything else happening to the city, the collapse of this single building was hardly noticeable.

Donut: WAIT, WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Tserendolgor never saw the message. Her name popped into the deceased crawlers folder. It was done.

Donut: CARL, WHY IS SHE DEAD? WHAT HAPPENED?

Carl: I’ll explain it all in a minute. I’m tossing Samantha to you now, and then we’re gonna have to pick our way toward the church. I don’t have the time or the supplies to set up another teleport. We have to go the long way around so we avoid the massive demon. We gotta get to Imani, and then we’ll figure out how we’re going to proceed. But we need to get out of here before Sister Ines shows back up or before whatever that demon is doing fucks us over. Tossing Samantha now.

I pulled the extension, and Samantha hopped into the scoop. She blinked at me as I tried to judge the distance. “Are we keeping the round guy? I like him. He’s really cute. Can I name him? I want to name him.”

“I haven’t decided yet if we’re keeping him,” I said. “Probably not. Donut will be scared that he’ll eat Mongo.”

“You have to keep him,” Samantha said. “That doggie died thinking you

were going to take care of him. He probably won’t eat Mongo if they grow up together. I once watched a ten-times resurrected one of those guys eat a

dragon. It was great!”

I paused. “Wait, really? A dragon?”

“It was a small dragon, but yes. Now throw me, Carl. I want to bite Donut’s tail.”

“You didn’t have to chew on me that hard,” Donut complained as we skulked around the corner of a building.

“I need to make a tight grip,” Samantha said as she hovered between us.

“It’s not my fault if I have a strong jaw game. I learned all about biting when someone abandoned me to get eaten by the two doggies on the last floor.”

It’d taken me three throws to get Samantha close enough to Donut, and even then, she had to travel for ten minutes before she got to her, where she promptly chomped down on Donut’s tail without warning. After teleporting her back to me, the cat had promptly yakked all over the ground, and she’d been grumbling about it ever since. Apparently that type of teleportation was even more unsettling than usual.

Donut sported a new, golden player killer skull. She hadn’t commented on it, and neither did I. That felt important, the nonchalance of it all. We were losing more of ourselves every day. I hoped we could manage to get off this damn floor without it happening again.

The zombie crabs and seals were everywhere, swarming over the city, moving away from the beach. It’d been a while since I saw a regular, non- undead crab or seal, and I wondered if any were left. I also hadn’t, thankfully, seen any of the full-power demons we’d freed from their shells. Hopefully those had made their way back to Sheol, but I wasn’t sure if that kind could drag people into hell like the possessed zombies could. Mordecai wasn’t sure, either.

The zombies were still turning into possessed demons here and there, but those would scream and skitter off toward Amayon, who remained, ramrod straight atop the tallest building, pouring fire upward like he was a fountain.

It was having an effect on the whole area. The air was getting noticeably hotter.

“Well, if you chomp me again like that I’m going to have Mongo chomp

you and see how you like it.”

“I do like it,” Samantha said.

“Shush, both of you,” I said, watching a zombie seal shuffle-flop down the street, chasing an oblivious memory ghost that miraculously was still fully clothed. The seal left a stream of red gore on the road. According to Mordecai, these things had a sort of communal mind, so we didn’t want any of them seeing us or they’d swarm.

Imani: No sign of the nun. Nothing has come in. There’s an out- building I can see through the door, and it’s some sort of temple. It’s a Club Vanquisher entrance. I just watched a ram NPC guy stick his head out of the door and cast a spell that killed a few zombies, but now a bunch more are milling around the entrance, so there’s a mass of them right in front of the church. He keeps opening the door to peer outside and shutting it quickly. The last time there was three of them, and what looked like a mantaur. The idiots are just luring more and more zombies into the area.

Carl: Okay. If you do see Sister Ines, just go back into the saferoom.

There’s no reason for you two to fight. Wait for us.

I was making a quick inventory of everything we’d looted, but it wouldn’t be until we got to a saferoom before I could truly examine it all. So far, it looked as if the best prizes were the Eye in the Sky scrolls, the magical tomes, Velma the Flame Thrower, the nickel sock, and, of course, Quan’s celestial cloak.

He’d truly had a lot of weapons on him. Even more than what I’d looted from the hunters. I wondered if his class, Sergeant-at-Arms had something to do with the reason why he kept it all. It was, I realized, all the loot he’d taken off the crawlers he’d killed. The least I could do was make certain it got put to good use.

I hadn’t yet told Donut about the tummy acher. I asked Mordecai for his advice.

Mordecai: Keep that thing in your inventory. You couldn’t go down the stairs with Mongo before because you didn’t have a pet carrier. This guy will be fine as long as you keep him boxed up. You can try bonding with him later. He’ll be a great pet for you should you decide to keep him, but you have too much on your plate right now to deal with trying to keep a level-one pet alive, especially if it has an undead weakness. And Ren made a mistake by saying what his weaknesses are out loud. The

factions guys aren’t supposed to be spying, but we both know that’s bullshit, even now.

Carl: Agreed. Also, I don’t see Sister Ines with my Find Crawler skill. Should I use one of those Eye in the Sky scrolls? Will that find her?

Mordecai: If you use it, have Donut do it. But yes, it will find her as long as she’s not in a saferoom or using some advanced hiding skills or spells. Those scrolls are really rare. How many do you have?

Carl: Five.

Mordecai: It’s up to you, but I would save them if you can. Have you decided what you’re going to do about Imani yet?

Carl: I’m giving her the key. Donut and I will take our chances.

Mordecai: She’s not going to take it.

Carl: Elle will convince her.

He didn’t answer.

“Look at the fishy!” Samantha said.

A zombie fish entered the alley, flopping. It spied us, and it made a gurgling noise as red foam bubbled out its gills. It started hopping on the ground toward us. Splatch, splatch, splatch. A loud groaning noise came from down the street as more zombies turned in our direction.

“Damnit,” I said. “Come on, guys.”

“So, did you beat him with his arm? I promised the Posse if you ever fought Quan again, you’d beat him with his arm. I even put it in the newsletter.”

We waited in yet another alley as Samantha pied-pipered a group of zombies away from our position. We’d gotten trapped between two buildings, and I sent her out there, which she’d done eagerly. I could hear her enthusiastic shouting from almost two blocks away as the zombies shuffled after her, clearing our path.

“I didn’t get the chance,” I said. “Golden Uzi Jesus and Asojano pretty much turned him into pulp. That was a really good combination.”

“You carried his arm around all this time, and you didn’t get to use it.

That’s a little disappointing. When we killed him, it gave me the keys, but I never got his cards. I bet he had a bunch of good ones. At least you got the dog lady’s cards. I suppose she did redeem herself in the end with her

deathbed confessions.”

“Quan did have some good cards,” I agreed, choosing not to engage her about Ren. I could tell it was mostly for show, and she was pretty shaken up about the death of the crawler. Even now, Donut was leaning into the feud for the viewers. “But I don’t think his cards were better or worse than ours. He was just really good with strategy. We pretty much had to be the cheaters to beat him.”

“Using a loophole isn’t cheating, Carl. Not when we do it. Oh, and what happened to that disgusting meatball?”

Before I was forced to tell her the truth, we were both interrupted by a new message.

Sister Ines: Carl and Donut. Are you there?

I exchanged a look with Donut.

Carl: Hello, Sister. How are you feeling?

Sister Ines: I know you have the last key. The door you seek is in the Iglesia de Jesús de Miramar. It is a holy place. I’ve prayed on it, and I know what I must do. I can’t let you in. If you open that door, it will be the end of everything. They told me so. This hell you see is only a sampling of what awaits us because of our sin.

Donut: JUST TRY TO STOP US YOU HALF-BREED BITCH.

Donut turned to me. “Wow. That came out way more racist sounding than I intended.”

Carl: Sister… what is going on? Who is ‘They?’ I thought we were friends. Tell us what’s happening.

Sister Ines: I am filled with power, Carl. With each demon who appears, I grow stronger. They come, they keep coming, and I am the last rampart protecting us all. It is because of my faith. I can save you. I must free you from this place before your soul is dragged into hell. I can’t save the cat, of course, as she is nothing but a rank beast.

Donut: HEY!

Sister Ines: But I can save you, Carl. Come to me, and I will show you the way. I showed my sisters, and I can show you. It’s not too late.

But if you try to enter that church, there will be nothing I can do for you.

I will be forced to stop you.

“Carl, she’s gone completely whackadoodle! I think her medication finally wore off!”

I shook my head. “It’s more than that. Whatever imbalance she had, it’s

been deliberately kicked back into place. I think it’s one of her sponsors.

During the last battle, the announcer guys said she was sponsored by the Nebulars. Her patron, too, which I think is pretty much the same thing. I think they gave her something that sent her back over the edge.”

“What? Why would they do that? Those are the hunter guys with the hats, right?”

“Yes. They’re not a single race, but a cult. Remember, they were guys in the audience in the mock card battle arena when you set it up the first time.

They worship the thing that runs the center system, and they have some pretty weird beliefs.” The strange, religious cult had been gunning for Prepotente on the last floor during the Hunting Grounds before I’d been forced to fight them and Vrah’s crew at the same time. It seemed they were still sore about me and Donut helping to wipe all of them out. I still didn’t know what their deal was in terms of their actual beliefs, but a picture was starting to form in my mind. “We need to be careful. I’ll try to keep her pacified until we can get the hell out of here.”

Carl: Okay. We can meet somewhere. We’ll talk. Where do you want us to go?

“We’re not really gonna meet her, right?”

“Hell, no. We just gotta keep her distracted.”

Sister Ines: Good, good. You won’t regret this, Carl. Come to the

FOSCA building.

Carl: I don’t know where that is.

Imani: Three demons just walked into the church. They’re huge!

They’re not the possessed zombies. They’re the level 140 pleasure demons. Carl, it says they’re minions of Sister Ines. How is that possible?

I thought you said she couldn’t control the real demons.

In the distance, the massive, demon-possessed snake stopped throwing fire into the sky.

“Here, Carl,” the giant snake bellowed. His voice echoed, shaking the ground. Glass shattered all around. It was clearly fighting the words, like it

was being forced to talk. “Come here.”

“What the shit?” I asked.

“Carl… is she controlling the giant demon?” Donut asked. “I thought he was like a god! How can she do that?”

“Fuck me,” I said, looking off into the distance. Uh-oh.

Sister Ines: Come now, Carl. Come or I will make the demons under

my control destroy that church. I don’t want to smash such a holy place, but I will. I will destroy it all if it will prevent you from opening that door.

“Carl, this is what you get for not letting Mongo eat her when we had the

chance,” Donut said.

“Well, shit,” I said.