Rain of Shadows and Endings — Chapter no 8

8 TESSA

S he slept for three days straight. When she managed to open her eyes, Theon was always beside her.

The first time he’d been sleeping, his body curled lightly around her own. Despite the ache in her bones, there was a calm that enveloped her at having him so close. While she slept nestled next to him, the bond rested in contentment too. No incessant pull or temptation. Her eyes had fallen on Luka, who’d apparently been tasked with keeping an eye on her while Theon slept. He’d asked if she’d needed anything, and Tessa had only shaken her head before she drifted off to sleep once more.

Another time, it was midday judging by the light streaming in through the balcony doors. Theon had been propped against the headboard looking over stacks of papers while referencing things on his laptop. His hand resting on her shoulder, his thumb had made small circles along her collarbone. He had immediately set everything aside when he saw her open eyes. He’d offered to bring her food or water, but she had fallen back to sleep again within minutes.

This time though, she could already tell it was different. There would be no going back to sleep. She needed to use the bathroom, and she could smell herself. She needed to get up and move around. A shower and fresh clothing sounded divine. But more than any of that, the cord inside her was back to tugging at her, pulling her awake.

She cracked her eyes open. Light filtered into the bedroom, telling her it was sometime during the day. Luka wasn’t in the chair by the fireplace, and the bed felt suspiciously empty. She rolled over to find the space Theon had occupied every other time she’d woken vacant. Pushing herself into a sitting position, she slid a hand through her limp hair. It felt greasy and gross. Her tongue felt thick and tasted of bile. She could only imagine what her breath smelled like.

She was about to go in search of a glass of water when Theon came through the doorway. He paused when he saw her sitting up, clearly surprised, before hurrying to the bedside.

“Tessa, how are you feeling?” he asked, reaching out and tipping her chin up to study

her face.

“Water,” she rasped.

“Of course.”

He left and returned a moment later with two bottles of water. He placed one on the nightstand before unscrewing the cap from the other, bringing it to her lips and tipping it so she could drink. She reached to take it from him, wanting to guzzle it down faster, but he stopped her.

“Slow down, Tessa. You are going to make yourself sick. You haven’t eaten in four days, and you haven’t drank anything in nearly as long.”

He put the cap back on before placing it on the bedside table. Turning back to her, he reached out to cup her cheek, and she jerked back. The bond punished her with a jolt through her body, and she winced. Frustration clouded Theon’s eyes, and Tessa dropped her gaze to the comforter.

“I need to take a shower and use the bathroom,” she said, twisting the sheets in her fingers.

“Okay. I can show you where your things are,” Theon replied, pulling the covers back so she could slide from the bed. He didn’t reach for her again, but he stayed close as she stood on unsteady legs. She followed him into the bathroom, the lights automatically coming on when they stepped through the door. She had lain on this floor for hours a few nights ago, but she’d never actually looked around the space. No, her line of vision had been solely the inside of the toilet bowl.

She stilled while Theon went in ahead of her. The bathroom was as luxurious as the rest of the suite. The walls were entirely black tiled, the floor a white marble that was heated beneath her bare feet. To her right was a door that led into the dressing room.

Directly ahead of her was a double sink vanity in dark wood tones. Copper faucets and fixtures adorned the space. Next to the dressing room entrance was a cosmetic vanity complete with a cushioned bench seat and mirror that would light up. Beyond that was the semi-private toilet space. In the back right-hand corner stood a large free-standing bathtub big enough for two, and next to it, spanning nearly the entire back wall, was a stunning, glass enclosed walk-in shower. Three large rainfall shower heads came from the ceiling along with various shower heads coming off different parts of the walls. A bench ran along the back.

Theon had gone to the far double sink and opened a drawer, pulling out a toothbrush and tube of toothpaste. “All your things are in these three drawers,” he said, setting the items on the counter. “I had Pen get a hair dryer and other things. They’re in this bottom drawer. If you need something else, let me know. There's a brush and comb here. Hair accessories and makeup are over in the make-up table for you,” he added, gesturing across at the space.

He retrieved some towels from a tall cupboard beside the shower and placed them on the counter. “I have shower products in the shower for you, unless you’d rather take a bath?”

Tessa shook her head, hugging herself tightly. “A shower is fine.”

“Okay,” Theon nodded, running a hand through his hair. He had dark stubble running along his jaw, as if he hadn’t shaved since they’d left the Acropolis. If he weren’t forcing her into some kind of glorified servitude, she’d find it attractive. As it stood, it just made her scowl in annoyance.

“Do you want to see the closet for clothing now or after you’ve bathed?” Theon ventured.

“Can I brush my teeth first?” she replied, hating she had to ask that.

“Of course,” Theon said, stepping aside. “I will meet you in there.”

Tessa brushed her teeth. Twice. And even then her mouth still didn’t feel quite clean.

She figured she’d brush again when she got out of the shower. Finding a tie for her hair in the vanity table and pulling her hair up and off her neck, she walked into the closet.

It was huge. She’d been wrong. Six of those small bedrooms could fit in here. Theon’s clothing took up one wall, while female clothing, shoes, and accessories took up the other three. In the center was an island with drawers on all sides. Theon had placed a pair of soft leggings and a long-sleeve shirt atop it.

“Does your skin still hurt, or will these be all right now?” he asked when she entered.

“I’m feeling better,” she murmured, still taking in the massive amount of clothing and shoes. Theon walked to a section and pulled a pair of slippers from a drawer. She was going

to have to draw a damn map of the dressing room to remember where everything was.

“You can wear these,” Theon said, placing them atop the pile of clothes. “Since socks are not a viable option.” His mouth twitched at the words, and Tessa gave him an unimpressed stare. “Do you need anything else?”

“I don’t think so,” she said, reaching for the clothing.

He held out the half-full bottle of water, but when her fingers wrapped around it, he didn’t let go. “Drink it slowly,” he warned.

“Yes, Master,” she replied derisively.

His eyes darkened a shade, and a muscle in his jaw ticked. The bond in her chest gave a sharp jerk at her… What? Making him upset? Hurting his feelings? Whatever. Now that she wasn’t vomiting magic or shivering with a godsdamn fever, her head felt clearer than it had in days. She was restless. And irritable. And hungry. And why were there no windows in here? It made the space feel too enclosed.

“Bathe, Tessa,” he finally said, releasing the water bottle. “I will order you some food and have it delivered as soon as possible.”

“Order food from where? Does anyone even deliver out here?”

“Our kitchen staff can make anything.”

“Is there no food in the kitchen? I can just make something when I am done.”

“Aside from the fact that you just woke up from sleeping for three days, my Source is not going to make her own food,” Theon answered, heading for the door. “Yell if you need anything.”

Tessa carried the clothing and the water bottle with her back into the bathroom, setting everything down on the sink beside the towels. She turned to the shower and realized she had no idea what buttons to push or knobs to use to turn anything on. After several rounds of trial and error, she finally got a few shower heads on and adjusted to a temperature that wasn’t freezing. She found shampoo and conditioner that smelled like lavender and mint and a body wash that smelled like jasmine. She nearly moaned as she washed days’ worth of sweat and grime from her body.

She didn’t know how long she stood in the water, but the longer she did, the more her mind tried to wrap itself around her situation. None of this should have happened. She’d been told repeatedly no one would want her. She was scarcely glanced at when the other heirs would come to the Estate to observe them all. She was nobody and nothing, as the Estate Mother liked to remind her every time her behavior needed correcting.

“You will be too much of a hassle for any of the royal households to want you. Don’t you want to be chosen to serve in their houses, Tessalyn?” Mother Cordelia chided, as Tessa sat in her small office for once again being beyond the yard. They kept telling her she would know when she’d gone too far, but she never did.

“Why would I want to serve in a house?” Tessa asked, her brow pinching. She was only six, but she was pretty sure that did not sound like something she would enjoy doing at all.

“That is the best any Fae could hope for, child,” Mother Cordelia said sternly. “Other than being Selected as a Source, but you will never be that. You are too wild. Too disobedient. Too much of a hassle. No one will want to bother with you.” The Estate Mother sighed, shuffling papers around on her desk. “Off to bed. I do not want to see or hear from you the rest of the day.”

“But it’s only high noon! I haven’t had lunch. And dinner—” Tessa protested, but her breath was stolen from her lungs. Mother Cordelia was a Legacy of the Sefarina bloodline, the goddess of the winds, and she currently had Tessa’s air cut off.

“And you will receive neither of those things until tomorrow,” Mother Cordelia said curtly. “Be grateful that is the extent of your punishment this time. Unless you would prefer the cellar again?”

Eyes wide and lungs burning, Tessa shook her head, gasping when Mother Cordelia released her hold on her. Last time she’d been punished, she’d been shut in one of the small cellars. It’d been cold and dark, and she hadn’t received food for two days. After that, it was only salty broth and crusty bread for a week straight.

“Off to bed,” she said again.

Tessa didn’t linger, rushing out of the office and up the two floors to the room she shared with five other younglings. They shared this room, but none of them ever had anything to do with her. They were too afraid of getting in trouble like Tessa always found herself in, despite her best efforts. Always alone… A tug on the bond pulled Tessa from her memories. She sighed, irritated at how much of a fit this thing inside her chest was throwing at being away from Theon. She couldn’t even enjoy a long, hot shower in peace. Shutting the water off, she grabbed a towel and quickly dried off. She wrapped her hair up into another towel while she dressed, not bothering with the slippers. She would always choose bare feet when given a choice. The bond was becoming unbearable, and Tessa gritted her teeth against the demands. It yanked at her, aching to get back to Theon’s side.

It terrified her.

If it was this demanding after the first Mark, what was it going to be like after the next?

She found a comb and began running it through her long hair. She could suddenly understand how Eviana could look at Valter the way she did. Her entire self was going to be wrapped up in Theon. She would become obsessed with him. Her world would revolve around him.

She brought the comb back up to work it through again, and her eyes fell on the Mark on the back of her hand. It seemed even darker against her skin now that it was freshly cleaned, seeming to taunt her. Arius’s symbol for all to see. For some reason, her mind slipped to Dex and the look of dread and knowing he’d had on his face when her name had been called.

There was a soft rapping on the doorframe followed by, “Tessa?”

She didn’t look up as Theon approached. She just continued to stare at the Mark on her hand.

The Mark that had stolen what little she had from her.

Theon didn’t say anything else. He pried the comb from her fingers. She hadn’t realized she’d still been holding it. He slowly began combing her hair for her. When he

finished, he tilted her face up to his.

“Are you feeling all right?”

Tessa nodded, refusing to cry yet again.

“Do you feel nauseous? Headache? Body aches?”

She shook her head.

His piercing green eyes held hers, searching. “I wish I knew what was going on inside your head right now,” he murmured, more to himself than her. “I wish I knew how to help you accept this.” When she dropped her gaze at his words, he sighed and took her hand.

“Come. They just brought up some food for you.”

He led her out to the main room where the food was apparently broth and fresh bread.

Fantastic.

“Can’t I have, I don’t know, doughnuts?” Tessa asked when Theon pulled a chair out for her.

“Doughnuts have no nutritional purpose.”

“I know, but they’re good,” she replied, picking up the spoon and stirring it through the steaming broth.

“Even if you were feeling your best, I wouldn’t let you eat doughnuts,” Theon said, moving past her and into the kitchen area. She twisted in her chair and watched as he filled a kettle with water.

“You won’t let me eat doughnuts?” she deadpanned.

He apparently didn’t pick up on the pissed off part of her attitude until he turned and saw her face. He braced his hands on the island countertop, leaning forward. “Tessa, my part of this Source bond is to take care of you. Giving you doughnuts is not taking care of your physical or nutritional needs. Eat.” He nodded towards the table.

Tessa turned around, mainly because she was too stunned by what he’d just said to do anything else. She scooped up a spoonful of broth and was about to bring it to her mouth when she just couldn’t not say anything. She dropped the spoon back into the bowl with a clatter, broth splashing onto the opulent black surface of the table. Twisting to face him again, she said, “I’m sorry. Are you saying that even when you’re satisfied that I am feeling one hundred percent better, I will not be allowed to eat doughnuts? Or pizza? Or fries?”

Theon glanced up at her. He was busy getting a tea bag placed in a charcoal grey mug as the teakettle began to whistle shrilly. He pulled it off the stove, pouring hot water into the mug. “Yes. That is exactly what I am saying. Allowing you to do so would be irresponsible of me.”

Tessa really was at a loss for words this time. She could only stare at him in utter disbelief as he came to her and set the mug of tea down by her soup bowl before sliding into the chair next to her. He had a pile of papers in his hand that he set down on the table and began going through. When she didn’t move, he reached over and slid her bowl forward an inch. “Eat,” he said before returning to whatever he was reading.

Tessa dutifully ate the entire bowl of broth and two pieces of bread—a habit from not knowing when she would lose food privileges again. The moment she finished, Theon was clearing her dishes and sliding the tea forward. When he returned to the table, he reached to smooth back a piece of hair, and Tessa flinched away. He sighed, lowering into his chair once more and turning to face her.

“Tessa, you realize that the only reason you slept so soundly for three days is because I rarely left your side, don’t you? If I did, it was for mere minutes. When I was beside you, some part of us was always touching, even if it was simply our arms brushing.”

Tessa stared down at her mug, watching the steam rise. That made sense, she supposed. She vaguely recalled waking at one point and feeling nothing but complete calm and contentment despite the pain her body was enduring.

“Where is Luka?” she asked.

“Luka does not need to be here, Tessa. You are not his Source. You are mine.”

Her eyes snapped to his, and she met emerald eyes bright with anger.

“Luka doesn’t get frustrated with me for having trouble dealing with the fact that my entire life was just stolen from me,” she retorted, glaring back at him.

“Can you just try, Tessa?” Theon said. “Can you try and let the Source bond do what it is supposed to do? Maybe you will find it is not nearly as bad as you are clearly envisioning. I have done nothing but take care of you and tend to your needs since Selecting you.”

“You are the reason you had to take care of me, Theon!” Tessa cried. “If you had not Selected me, there would have been no reason to take care of me and tend to my needs.”

“Aside from that unfortunate necessity, I have provided and will continue to provide everything you could ever need,” he argued.

“Unfortunate necessity?” Tessa scoffed in disbelief. “Leaving that convoluted argument alone for a moment, you are literally deciding what I eat. How is taking away my

choices not that bad?”

“I am keeping you healthy.”

“You are keeping your prized pet in mint condition,” she sneered.

Theon stared back at her for a long moment before he turned and began gathering his papers. His voice was tight and his words clipped when he said, “Luka needed to get some air, so he went to his estate for the day. He will return this evening. You are free to do as you wish in here, but it is imperative that you do not leave our rooms.”

“Luka already gave me the lecture about not being allowed to leave the pretty cage,” she snapped.

Theon’s lips pressed into a thin line. He took a few moments, clearly trying to compose himself. “Rest. I am going to shower,” he finally said.

He left the room, leaving Tessa sitting at the table, her tea growing cold.

Five days.

It had been five days of being cooped up in these rooms. Tessa had read several books from the bookshelves, all of them some sort of history or textbook. That was all Theon appeared to have in here. She’d also watched more mundane television than she cared to ever watch again. She couldn’t even say she really watched it. She certainly hadn’t been invested in any of the shows. Sitting idle had never been her thing, and being stuck in the same space for too long made her stir-crazy. It was part of the reason she so often found herself in undesirable situations.

Luka had returned, but he kept his distance, encouraging her to try and follow the lead of the bond and connect with Theon. That just made her more agitated, so now she only spoke to either of them when absolutely necessary. She had insisted on sleeping in the

uncomfortable bed in that tiny room, much to Theon’s annoyance and displeasure, and she took a small sense of satisfaction at denying the bond, despite the cord thrashing violently in her chest all night. Needless to say, she hadn’t slept well the last five days. She’d taken to napping on the sofa when Theon joined her. He would sit at one end, reading through papers or working on his laptop. His nearness would calm the thing enough that she could slip into sleep.

Tessa stirred her fruit, granola, and honey that he’d ordered her for breakfast, wishing it was pancakes topped with bananas, chocolate chips, and whipped cream. She was nestled in the bay window she’d found herself in more often than not. It overlooked a huge garden area behind the house. The gardens appeared to have paths going off in various directions, and she wondered where they all led to. Did any go up into the mountains? Or did they all just loop back in one giant circle? And what did anyone need gardens this big for anyway?

Were there hidden areas to get lost in? Were there actual gardens with food and herbs?

She heard the door clicking as she took a bite. Assuming it was Luka, she was planning on dutifully ignoring him, but when the door opened, it was not Luka who came in.

The male who walked through the door was devastatingly beautiful, as attractive as Luka and Theon. He had thick dark hair with auburn undertones to it rather than the inky black of Theon’s hair. His hair was a little longer too. His eyes, though, were as green as Theon’s. He was only an inch shorter than him and appeared to be close to her age of twenty-three. That meant he’d already undergone his Staying so she couldn’t say what his age was for sure. Most Fae and Legacy went through their Staying in their early twenties, when the magic in their blood would keep their bodies from further aging. Tessa had undergone her own Staying at twenty years.

“Um, hi?” Tessa said as she swallowed a bite of blueberries, eyeing the newcomer.

Luka had told her only a select few had access to these rooms, and so far, it had only been them.

The male had several small boxes in his hands as he studied her with curiosity in his bright eyes. He wore black pants and a white dress shirt with the top few buttons undone.

His sleeves were rolled up, revealing muscular forearms dusted with dark hair.

“You must be Tessa,” he answered.

Feeling incredibly uncomfortable, she started to call for Theon, but his name got stuck in her throat.

Because she wasn’t alone with Theon or Luka.

Which was just fucking perfect.

“Master,” she called with faux sweetness dripping from her tone. “You have a gentleman caller.”

The male’s brows rose in surprise, and amusement filled his features.

Theon came into the room shirtless, and Tessa felt her stomach dip and curl in all sorts

of completely unacceptable ways.

This fucking bond.

He wore jeans that hung obnoxiously low on his hips showcasing the muscles that tapered and dipped below his waistband beautifully. He was toweling his hair dry, and his attention went to her first before shifting to the newcomer.

“Axel? What are you doing here?” he asked, coming to a stop in the doorway.

The male’s gaze shifted from her to Theon. “I ran into Luka a bit ago. He wanted to get some air and asked if I could bring these to you.” He walked further into the room, setting the boxes on the dining table.

“I’m surprised it’s taken you this long to show up here. Pen said you returned two days ago,” Theon said with a grin, tossing the towel across his desk chair and striding forward.

“You could have invited me sooner, jackass,” the male said, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the table. “Apparently I should have waited longer. Things have clearly not settled into place here.” An amused smirk tilted on his mouth again as his gaze shifted back to Tessa.

Tessa felt her cheeks heat under his scrutiny. Theon was going through the packages and glanced up at his words. “It’s been…interesting,” he said tightly, setting a small box back down. “Tessa, this is my younger brother, Axel. Axel, Tessa.”

Brother. That made sense. She’d forgotten all about the fact that he had a brother.

“Pleasure,” Axel said with a dip of his chin in her direction.

When Tessa didn’t reply, Theon said, “Tessa, you can call me Theon in Axel’s presence as you can when Luka is around.”

“How generous of you,” she snipped in response, turning back to the window and continuing to eat her fruit.

A chuckle came from Axel. “Oh, she is a delight. I think I like her.”

“You would,” Theon remarked. “You will have to excuse her. She’s been in a mood the last several days.”

“That will happen when you have magic shoved into your body, spend days in excruciating pain, and then be denied the pleasure of doughnuts and pizza,” she called out sardonically.

“It also happens when you do not get adequate sleep and become obstinately stubborn,” Theon retorted through gritted teeth.

“Obstinate and stubborn mean the same thing. Pick a different adjective,” she shot back.

Axel fell into a fit of laughter as the door opened once more, and Luka entered.

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, look. Asshole number two has returned.”

Axel’s laughter only increased.

“Tessa, I see your mood has improved from unruly to bratty,” Luka said in greeting.

She flipped him off over her shoulder.

“Maybe if you gave her some doughnuts, she’d be nicer,” Axel suggested when he was

able to form words again.

“Doubtful,” Theon muttered.

Axel pulled a chair out from the dining table and took a seat, relaxing into it. “I hope you’ve warned her to keep her delightful comments to herself at dinner tonight? Could you imagine Father’s face?”

At the mention of Valter and dinner tonight, Tessa whipped around to face Theon.

“What is he talking about?”

A muscle feathered along his jaw as he met her gaze. “We are to have a family dinner this evening with my parents, Axel, and Luka,” Theon said. “I trust you remember how to act in my father’s presence?” She nodded mutely. “Good. Dinner is at seven and will be formal, so plan your day accordingly.”

At the order, annoyance raced back through her. “Well, my day is pretty full between watching boring television shows, napping, and eating a salad, but I’m sure I can rearrange my schedule to fit in a shower before dinner.”

“Please see that you do,” Theon replied through clenched teeth.

“Will do, Master.”