Rain of Shadows and Endings — Chapter no 40

40

TESSA

S he’d fucked up.

She’d fucked up so bad.

But her dread of Theon’s wrath was momentarily forgotten at finding the Arius Lord here. He wasn’t supposed to be here until tomorrow. He and Cressida were to arrive in the evening, right before the Emerging Ceremony. They were staying at the country estate, not here. He wasn’t supposed to be here.

“Theon,” Valter replied coldly to his son’s greeting. The Lord didn’t bother acknowledging Axel or Luka.

“This is unexpected. I thought you and Mother were arriving tomorrow evening,”

Theon said evenly.

“Your mother will arrive tomorrow evening as planned,” Valter agreed.

“I see.”

I see?

That was all Theon was going to say. Admittedly, she’d only seen him interact with his father a handful of times, and most of the times were when others were around. He’d tried to keep her from him as much as possible.

Yet another way he’d tried to protect her, she realized now.

She hadn’t understood.

She hadn’t tried to understand. Even if she’d tried, would she have cared?

It is not your place to understand. Your place is to serve.

She shoved the thoughts aside. This was not the place to spiral, to lose control. Despite what they all thought, she could control herself.

For the most part.

Thick tension filled the room, and where was Eviana? Tessa had never seen Valter without her. She forced herself to stand. No fidgeting. That’s what Mother Cordelia had drilled into her, and gods, why was she feeling grateful for that right now? But she didn’t understand what was happening. Theon and Valter seemed to be in some sort of stand-off.

Axel was hovering close to her, and Luka was a foot from Theon, his muscles tight and his eyes already shifted to vertical pupils.

“I am waiting,” Valter said after an entire minute of silence.

“I can see that,” Theon replied. “I am unaware of what exactly you are waiting for, seeing as I did not know you were arriving tonight.”

“Do not get smart,” Valter sneered, setting his glass aside with a hard thunk. “Tell me why I have been receiving correspondence all godsdamn evening about a dragon being

spotted outside the Acropolis.”

Oh gods.

That’s all Tessa could think as she watched this play out.

“My Source was attacked by Night Children,” Theon answered. “Luka was taking care of them. We thought we had covered all our tracks, but just learned…” Tessa saw the muscle tick in his jaw before he finished, “Apparently we missed one.”

“Night Children do not require a fucking dragon, Theon,” Valter snarled, pushing to his feet. “If they were stupid enough to attack your Source in your presence, you should have been more than enough to handle them. Are you saying that is not the case? That you are not strong enough to protect what is yours? That you have failed at even that?”

“No,” Theon answered. “There were several of them. Some ran. While I stayed back to protect my Source, Luka went after the others. It was dark. We stayed low—”

“We?” Valter interrupted. “What do you mean ‘we?’”

Theon shifted his weight. Barely, but Tessa saw it.

Valter did too, and his eyes narrowed. “Do not even fucking think of lying to me, Theon.”

“I thought it best to get my Source back here as quickly as possible, so I flew her back.

But as I said, we stayed low,” Theon answered.

“So this is your Guardian’s fault?” Valter asked, his gaze shifting to Luka.

“No,” Theon immediately interjected. “This is the fault of whoever was trying to

abduct my Source.”

“And who was that?”

“We do not know yet. Our efforts have been unfruitful so far.”

“So what you are telling me is that instead of making alliances and doing what I have sent you here to do, you have spent your days trying to figure out who is trying to abduct your Source? And not only have you failed at that, but you have released secrets kept by our kingdom for decades?”

“Not that many people know—” Theon started.

“One person knowing is too many!” Valter roared. “Not only that, Rordan knows.

Explain to me how the Achaz Lord knowing we have been harboring a Sargon descendant for decades is not a problem, Theon.”

“We will take care of it,” Theon answered immediately.

“Your recent failures say otherwise.”

“I have not failed at anything,” Theon retorted, and Axel tensed beside her. She glanced at him side-long. His features gave nothing away, but his eyes were nearly black, there was so much darkness swimming in them.

“You think I do not have eyes here? That I do not know exactly what the three of you have accomplished while here?” Valter demanded, and Tessa couldn’t help the small flinch as his voice continued to rise. “Not only have you revealed some of our greatest secrets and jeopardized countless relations I have spent decades forging, you have also made us appear weak.”

“How do you figure that?” Theon countered. “Being able to harbor a dragon shifter for decades seems anything but weak.”

“No, but allowing another to publicly interact with your Source does,” Valter said, a cruel smirk curving on his lips as his dark gaze settled on Tessa.

Any remaining blood drained from her face. She was certain she was paler than a spirit of the After right now.

“She was acting on my orders,” Theon said quickly, drawing Valter’s attention back to him. “She is trying to find out information for us.”

Valter’s brow arched. “So you can loan her out to a random Legacy but not your own kingdom?”

“I did not loan her out,” Theon said from between clenched teeth.

“Then explain what was reported to me.”

“I just did.”

“Was I not clear on what was expected of you and your Source?” Valter demanded.

“Yes,” Theon answered. “It is because of your demands this happened.”

Valter scoffed. “She has caused nothing but problems since you brought her home.

Perhaps a different choice needs to be made.”

“Killing another’s Source is punishable by death,” Theon snarled, taking a step forward. Axel shifted so he partially shielded Tessa.

“And who hands out that judgment, Theon?” Valter asked with a cruel sneer, darkness beginning to pool around him.

“Killing her now would be foolish,” Axel cut in. “Theon needing to begin a new bond with another Source would be a setback and impede upon our plans.”

“Now you desire to have input?” Valter said, rounding on Axel. Axel reached back and shoved Tessa further behind him.

“I always have input, Father,” he answered. “You simply rarely deign to ask for it.”

A growl came from the Lord, but before he could answer, Theon spoke again. “I think the wise course of action here is to wait until we see what her gifts manifest as at the Emerging Ceremony. If they are not of value, then we can revisit this possible course of

action.”

What?

Without thinking, she opened her mouth to question that, but a hand slipped over it before she could.

“Tessalyn, do not speak,” came Luka’s whispered voice in her ear, the entrancing slipping beneath her skin and holding her tongue. Where had he come from?

“From what I can tell, she is the source of every problem we are suddenly facing,”

Valter countered. “Perhaps it would be prudent to simply rid ourselves of her now.”

“You know she will be an asset,” Theon argued. “Her predicted power levels alone show that. If they are wrong after tomorrow’s ceremony, then I agree with you.”

Luka’s hand was still over her mouth despite his entrancing, and an arm wrapped around her waist. “Be still, Tessa,” he murmured.

But her entire body was trembling. She couldn’t control it. Uncontrollable. That’s what she’d always been, and now it was going to cost her life.

And she couldn’t help the sudden rush of relief that went through her at the thought.

All these years of wishing for death, and now she was this close to finally having it.

The idea of dying was terrifying, but the idea of truly not having to care anymore? That idea was freeing.

“I have no choice but to be agreeable to that,” Valter agreed begrudgingly. “But I would suggest you observe the Fae closely tomorrow.”

“I will make sure I have alternates in mind to discuss with you if necessary,” Theon replied, the tension in his shoulders easing a fraction.

Valter was silent, giving a mute nod of his head, and Tessa thought they were done.

That Valter would do nothing else until after the ceremony tomorrow. That she could prepare herself for everything to come, but then Valter spoke once more.

“Eviana, bring her.”

Tessa had momentarily stopped trembling, but now her body vibrated so violently, her teeth clattered as Eviana came in from the other room with Pen. The female was bound in vines, and as they came closer, another thick rope of thorny vines appeared in Eviana’s hand. There were no plants in this townhouse. Most Fae with the earth element needed

some sort of nature around them. Only the strongest of the element could conjure it directly.

It was unheard of for Fae. Only the Legacy of Silas were known to be able to do so.

“What is the meaning of this?” Theon demanded, taking a step towards Pen then stilling.

“There are still consequences for your multiple failures, Theon,” Valter answered, casually swiping up his drink and taking a sip. He smacked his lips a few times, studying the liquid before he said, “A fate similar to your previous servant should do.”

“No!” Axel and Theon yelled at the same time, and Luka’s hold around her waist intensified to where Tessa was finding it hard to draw breath. She didn’t understand what was happening. She knew their previous caretaker had been Caris and that she had died, but… “I’ll take it,” Theon said. “The failures are mine. Whatever the punishment for that failure, I will accept.”

Valter rolled his eyes, a scowl forming. “Still your greatest weakness. Always needing to be a godsdamn martyr.” He strode towards Eviana and Pen, sliding his fingers along Eviana’s torso as he moved. “But it certainly makes getting my point across easier.”

“Father, please—”

“Enough, Theon!” he barked, and Theon fell silent.

Tessa couldn’t see his face, but she could feel the dread rolling off of him. Surely he wasn’t going to let this happen. This was Pen. They adored her. He would do something.

But he didn’t.

He stood still, Axel beside him.

“What shall it be this time?” Valter mused.

There was a second of tense silence, and then Pen cried out, blood appearing around the binds at her wrists as thorns grew and dug into her flesh.

Neither Theon nor Axel moved.

“No additional begging or pleading this time, boys?” Valter asked with a mocking grin.

Neither one spoke. It didn’t even look like either was breathing. Why didn’t they do something? Surely Luka could do something. Why was no one doing anything?

But no one moved as Eviana produced a wooden stake and shoved it into Pen’s side, blood dripping to the floor.

No one said anything as Valter berated them and told Theon this was his fault for failing.

No one did anything as a dagger was produced and dragged across the female’s middle.

It wasn’t until Eviana sent the vine in her hand snaking up Pen’s body to her throat, wrapping tightly and thorns growing and digging in with every pass, that someone finally

moved.

Axel snapped.

Or rather, his darkness did.

Whips of it appeared as he snarled, “For fuck’s sake, that’s enough.”

Tessa’s scream was muffled by Luka’s hand when Axel’s darkness took Pen’s head and twisted, the crack echoing in the room before he stalked forward and snatched the dagger that had fallen to the floor and plunged it into Pen’s heart.

And Valter was smiling.

Grinning from ear-to-ear as if he was proud of his son.

“Maybe you’re not a complete waste after all,” Valter said. Shadows rose up behind him, Eviana coming to his side, and he stepped backwards into the flowing darkness, disappearing.

“Fuck!” Axel bellowed, more darkness exploding from him. A shield of Luka’s dragon fire surrounded her, protecting her as he shoved her down to the floor. Axel’s darkness didn’t just explode, it destroyed. The furniture went flying, the side tables splintering as they hit the walls. Mirrors and lamps shattered, shards of glass melting as they collided with Luka’s shield. She had never seen Axel lose control. Never even thought he’d been on the edge of losing control. Even now, it had come out of nowhere. Theon had tells when he was

riding that edge, but Axel?

That was terrifying.

From the floor, she found herself staring at Pen’s lifeless body across from her, her features still twisted in pain and dull blue eyes staring at nothing. She had done nothing but serve the Arius House loyally for decades. First in the kitchens, and eventually becoming Theon and Axel’s personal servant. And he had killed her. For nothing.

No.

Not for nothing.

Because of her.

“Burn the body and gather the ashes, Luka,” Theon said, his voice strangely monotone. “We will take them to Sinvons Lake for a Farewell after the Emerging Ceremony. Scatter them where we buried Caris’s ashes.”

He didn’t look at her. None of them did. Luka stood, his fire flaring out as he scooped up Pen’s lifeless body. Tessa didn’t know where he was going. Axel had already disappeared. She hadn’t realized he’d left.

Theon turned and headed up the stairs, and she wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do. For weeks now, her every move had been decided for her. Taking a deep breath, she followed.

When she reached the third floor, she found Theon had already changed. He had athletic shorts on and a long-sleeve top. The same clothes he wore when they went running.

He was lacing up his sneakers when she entered, and he didn’t pause, let alone look at her.

Wringing her hands together, she cleared her throat lightly before saying, “You are

going for a run?”

“Yes.”

“Do you…want me to go with you?”

“No.”

And fuck, she didn’t know what she was supposed to do.

“I’m sorry, Theon,” she whispered. “I know Pen was…endeared to you.”

“This was not the first time this has happened. It won’t be the last,” he answered shortly, pushing to his feet. He shoved his phone into his pocket before grabbing some earbuds. Two of his rings were gone, only the onyx one that matched Axel’s remaining.

“Theon, I need you to tell me what to do,” she said quietly.

“Why?” he sneered. Emerald eyes settled on her, the shadows so thick in them, they were more black than green. “Why do you need me to tell you what to do? You repeatedly

choose to do the exact opposite of what I request of you.”

“I…”

But she trailed off as he took slow steps towards her, and she was backing up with every step he took until her back hit the wall. She’d been wrong. Axel’s unpredictable rage was terrifying, but Theon’s cold, unyielding rage?

That was petrifying.

Theon’s rage was calculating, just like his father’s. When he let his anger out, it was with purpose. It would hurt where it mattered, just like forcing them to watch Pen be tortured had affected them.

Theon braced his hands on either side of her head, and his voice was low and far too calm. “I told you everything you did reflected on me, Tessa. This should not be a surprise.”

She knew this was her fault, but to hear Theon speak it aloud… “I’m sorry,” she repeated.

“I told you before, I do not need your apologies nor do I want them. What is it I

require of you, Tessa?”

“Obedience,” she whispered.

“Did I not make it clear that the consequences for failure would be harsher now?”

“You did.”

For several long moments, they only stared at each other, the shadows growing darker and darker in his eyes.

Until his darkness was wreathing his forearms and winding through his dark hair like an onyx halo.

“You were supposed to fix things,” he said in a sharp hiss. “You were supposed to make things better. Help us stand against him. Instead, my world has been nothing but chaos since you stepped foot in it.”

“I did not ask to be in your world!” she cried, the thing inside of her snapping to attention.

“You couldn’t just do as you were told, could you?” he continued, ignoring her outburst. “I tell you to stay with us at all times; you leave and require Luka and I to save you. I tell you everything I do is to protect you; you fight me at every turn. I tell you not to let another touch you. Not only do you allow another to do just that, you do so in public where everyone can see, and now Pen is dead.”

Tessa lurched back, pressing further into the wall. “I know that is my fault, but—”

“It is entirely your fault,” he snarled, his words as sharp as the dagger used to take Pen’s life. “Her death is directly correlated to your actions.”

“I was trying to find out information for you! We already had this argument, Theon.

You defended me to your father—”

“Of course I defended you, Tessa!” he shouted. “You are still mine to protect, even if it does require me to constantly deal with the messes you create.”

The words hit their mark, whether intended or not, and she instantly shoved down

every thought and insecurity.

She instantly became nothing.

So close to being something.

She nodded mutely as his words settled deep into her soul. He was still hurling verbal insults at her, but she couldn’t hear them.

Too wild.

Too much to deal with.

Not worth the hassle.

Nothing.

A bruising grip on her elbow pulled her from her thoughts. She had removed her heels as she climbed the steps, but she still stumbled as she struggled to keep up with his long strides.

“Theon, where are we going?” she asked, stumbling yet again on the stairs.

“I am going for a run,” he replied.

“I’m not in shoes for running.”

“Funny, you ran all the way to the river without shoes. I didn’t think such things

mattered.”

“Theon, I—”

But they’d reached the main floor, and he wasn’t pulling her to the front door. He was pulling her to the kitchen, and she didn’t understand what was happening.

“Luka and Axel are right. This isn’t working,” he muttered. “I try to be reasonable; you throw it back in my face. I try to give you space; you still refuse to give even a little bit.

I push; you push back.”

“Theon—”

“I’m done trying, Tessa,” he snapped, his words growing more clipped the longer he spoke. “You have single-handedly ruined plans that I have spent years formulating.”

“I didn’t know—”

“It’s not your place to know!” he shouted, yanking open the pantry door.

“Theon…”

But when he reached for the door that would lead down to the wine cellar, her heart rate picked up. “Theon, wait. Please. Just wait.”

She dug in her heels, trying to find something to grab onto with her other hand as he pulled her down the steps into the cellar. It was a small, windowless space with stone walls and low lighting. There were two racks full of wine, with hardly enough room to move between them. The space was cool to keep the wine chilled, cold on her bare feet.

“Theon, why are we down here?” She could hardly speak, unable to keep her voice from wavering.

“I am going running. Luka is taking care of Pen, and Axel has left. You have repeatedly proven you cannot be trusted to be left alone.”

“I won’t go anywhere,” she pleaded, clawing at his arm as he released his grip on her elbow. “Please don’t, Theon!”

But his shadows were peeling her off of him, dragging her away from him, shoving her to the cold floor.

“Theon, don’t.” Tears were streaming down her face, and all she could do was say the same thing over and over. “Please don’t. Please don’t make me stay down here.”

He slowly lowered to a crouch before her, his emerald eyes chips of hard stone as he brushed her hair back from her face. Hope bubbled up when he stared at her, and then it shattered when he said, “I told you there would be harsher consequences. If only I’d known this was all I had to do from the beginning.”

Then he was taking the stairs two at a time, the door banging shut behind him. His darkness went with him, and she was scrambling up the stairs. But the door was locked, and she was screaming as she pounded on it. She was stuck, trapped within these walls. No windows. No way out. And she could hardly get down air. Just like when Mother Cordelia

would withhold air.

There was no one to hear her cries.

Theon had left.

Axel had left.

Luka had left.

Alone.

Completely alone.

This was why hope was pointless.

This was why she didn’t bother caring about anything.

This was why she wished for death.

She stumbled back down the stairs, dropping to her knees as she ran her hands along the floor. She wasn’t made to be kept inside. She needed to be out. She needed to be able to

see the sky, feel the wind.

There had to be a way out, out, out.

But there wasn’t.

There were no cracks in the marble floor. Her fingernails cracked and bled as she clawed at the stone walls, trying to find some place that she could dig. That she could do

something.

But there was nothing.

Nothing but the lightning crackling at her fingertips.

Nothing but the glowing of her palms.

Nothing but light floating around her like twinkling mist.

Nothing but her fury as she tipped her head back and screamed, streaks of light bursting from her palms. Wine bottles shattered as she broke, shards of glass slicing into her

skin as they exploded.

She didn’t feel them.

She didn’t feel anything as she crumpled to the floor, curled into herself, and began

going through song lyrics.

One more second.

One more minute.

One more song.