Rain of Shadows and Endings — Chapter no 13

13

THEON

A xel and Luka both arrived before the agreed upon time, just as Theon expected they would, and both were equally wary when they entered. They acted as if they were entering a battlefield, and maybe they were. Time would tell, he supposed.

The entire time he’d been on his horse, he had mulled over what to do with Tessa.

He’d tried one last time to convince her with the pull of the bond itself. He’d prayed to the gods he could get her to just accept this fate after kissing her and sleeping beside her. She’d been so close until his father had shown up and ruined everything.

Again.

So it had come to this. It had come to him forcing her into submission. He’d looked at her indifferently as he’d rained down commands and orders. He’d treated her the way he’d seen other Lords and Ladies treat their Sources. Not like his father treated Eviana. He would never treat Tessa like that. Then again, he’d never planned on treating Tessa this way, yet here he was. But he had not anticipated her resisting the Source bond. That possibility had never crossed his mind once.

“How did everything go?” Luka asked, going straight to the kitchen and pouring himself some coffee. Theon had ordered food from the kitchens to be delivered shortly.

“If you mean did I lose control with her, no,” Theon answered curtly, sliding his mug and Tessa’s across the counter to be refilled.

“And how is she?” Luka pressed, filling a mug for Axel as well.

Theon drummed his fingers on the counter, his lips forming a thin line before he finally answered, “I’m hoping we came to an understanding.”

Luka studied him, sipping on his coffee. There was a knowing look there that Theon both loved and hated. Part of being nearly inseparable while growing up meant the male knew him better than most.

“What does that mean?” Axel asked, coming over to grab his mug after letting the kitchen staff in, allowing them to set the table.

Theon glanced at his watch. Tessa knew what time breakfast was to be served. He wouldn’t put it past her to test just how serious he was, but he was hoping something had come from making her sit at his feet a few nights ago. He added this entire debacle to the list of things he hoped would be worth it in the end.

Sighing, he answered, “It means I need her submission, and I’ll do whatever is needed to have it.”

Axel blinked at him. “You sound like Father when you speak like that.”

Luka whistled low under his breath at the words, and Theon immediately went on the defensive. “It is nothing like Father. She is treated like a queen compared to how Eviana is treated.”

“How he treats Eviana is not exactly a standard to measure against,” Axel shot back.

Luka cleared his throat, his eyes flicking to the bedroom door, and Theon and Axel both turned. Theon’s breath caught. He’d lain out a sleeveless red dress with white polka dots and a neckline that dipped low. The front hem of the dress fell to just below her knees while the back draped down to her heels where white stiletto sandals adorned her feet.

She’d curled her hair so it fell in loose waves around her shoulders, and while she didn’t need cosmetics, she certainly knew how to use them. Gold hoops hung from her ears, and a

pendant necklace of some sort hung low, dipping into the neckline of the dress. Several gold bangles were on her wrists.

Axel gave an appreciative whistle, breaking the silence. “Look at you, baby doll. Did you get all dressed up just for us?”

Tessa looked pointedly at Theon before her eyes slid to Axel, and she said tightly, “I am told I’m going to Castle Pines later today and that my previous attire was not appropriate for such a trip.”

Theon swiped up her refilled coffee and crossed the room, pressing the mug into her hand. As he did so, he gently touched her elbow and leaned in to kiss her cheek. “You look lovely, Tessa,” he murmured.

She tensed, but she didn’t pull back. He’d be lying if he said this wasn’t part of the plan. He was hoping if she allowed him to touch her more in small ways like this, she’d give in to the pleasure of the bond sooner, realizing how much better it would be.

Her lips didn’t so much as twitch when she met his gaze. Those grey eyes were a whirlwind of emotions he didn’t know how to decode.

“Are you ready to eat?” he asked.

“I am told that is no longer my decision to make.”

“Tessa,” he warned in a low tone.

“Don’t ask me questions like I have choices, Master,” she replied quietly enough that the others could not hear. “You made it perfectly clear I do not.”

He clenched his teeth at the response, but he nodded once.

“May I move to the table, or will that be considered pulling away from you?”

Theon glanced down to where his hand still cupped her elbow, and he dropped it, stepping aside for her to pass. When she reached the table, she paused, looking over her shoulder at him. He wasn’t sure why until he realized she was waiting for permission to sit before the Legacy had taken their seats. His chest did something weird at the action.

She did this, he reminded himself, giving her a nod to take her seat. Theon glanced at Luka, whose brows were raised in surprise at the exchange as he came from the kitchen to join the table. Axel’s attention was fixed on Tessa, his lips pressed into a thin line. He didn’t know why they were so upset by this. They needed her to fall into line as much as he did.

Theon slid into the chair next to Tessa and reached to pour her a glass of orange juice.

Axel and Luka glanced between the two of them as they began filling their own plates with pancakes, scrambled eggs, fresh fruit, and bacon, passing the serving dishes around the table.

“So…why are you going to Castle Pines, and can I come?” Axel asked, never one to let silence linger. He handed the bacon platter across to Tessa. She reached for it, but Theon beat her to it. He placed two strips onto her plate. Her lips pursed at the action, but she held her tongue.

“I have a few things to get for the Acropolis,” Theon replied, taking the scrambled egg dish from him as well. “I just received an email with a few additional events that I need to prepare for. I also thought Tessa might want to get out of the house for a while. You know.

Somewhere other than the woods.”

Tessa paused her movement of bringing a piece of bacon to her mouth, but only for a moment. She didn’t react in any other way to the comment as she took a bite.

That was unexpected. Even with the strict rules he’d lain down earlier this morning, he hadn’t anticipated her giving in so quickly. He should feel elated at her behavior, instead he was…not. It was a marvel she was still somehow making things difficult, even following his own fucking rules.

“So can I join you?” Axel said after another moment of awkward silence.

“Of course,” Theon answered, sliding a pancake onto Tessa’s plate. “What flavor syrup do you want, Tessa?”

She slid her eyes to him. “Oh, Master,” she said with a mocking sweetness, her lashes fluttering. “There you go with the illusion of choices again. I trust you to know what is best for me.” She scooped up a forkful of fluffy eggs and smiled serenely at him as she brought the bite to her mouth.

“What exactly was said between you two?” Luka asked, his fork hitting his plate with a light clang. He leaned back in his chair, studying them both from across the table.

Theon gritted his teeth as he poured syrup onto the pancake. “Expectations were simply stated,” he answered tightly.

“And said expectations were accepted?” Luka pressed, looking at Tessa.

“Mhmm,” Tessa murmured, sipping on her orange juice.

“Really?” Luka asked, his tone saying how unlikely he found that. “Because this,” he motioned between Theon and Tessa, “does not seem like something was agreed to and settled.” When Tessa didn’t respond, her eyes dropping to her plate, Luka shifted his gaze back to him. “Theon?”

“What do you want me to say, Luka?” he asked in exasperation, leaning back in his own chair. “She can’t try running again. You know this. We were lucky it wasn’t discovered this time. So yes, new rules and expectations were put into place after the events of yesterday.”

Luka looked back and forth between Theon and Tessa a few more times before picking up his fork and digging into his breakfast without another word. Axel began speaking of a few places he’d like to stop at in Castle Pines, trying to ease the tension as he always did.

Theon watched Tessa from the corner of his eye while conversation took place around her. She silently ate her meal and replied with short, but polite, one-word answers when Axel or Luka spoke to her. They were clearly upset by her sudden reclusiveness. Theon was more than curious as to not only how this day would play out, but also how long she would be able to control herself. His greatest fear was her losing that little thread of control she seemed to have again tonight, and he made a mental note to be sure they were home well before dinner.

When breakfast was done, Luka and Axel went to grab a few things from their rooms before they left for Castle Pines. Theon had been clearing dishes and moving them into the kitchen. Pen would come and see to them while they were away. Now he went to his desk, pulling a small box from the drawer. He returned to the table, sliding his coffee mug out of the way. Tessa was still seated, staring out the bay window across the room and clearly lost to her own thoughts. Her hands were wrapped loosely around her coffee mug, and Theon almost snapped a photo. Unable to help himself, he reached out and brushed his fingers along her arm, and she jolted at the touch.

Her eyes snapped to his in a panic as she blurted, “You startled me. That wasn’t me pulling away from you.”

He frowned. “I didn’t mean to startle you. I have something for you.”

Her shoulders relaxed some, and she glanced down at the table, her brows arching in surprise when she spotted the box. “A phone?”

He nodded, opening the box to take the phone from it. It was the latest phone on the market. He’d had Luka pick it up for him a few days ago, and he’d spent his morning setting it up after his discussion with her.

When he held it out to her, she looked at him in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

He tilted his head at the statement. “You don’t understand what?”

“Why you got me a phone.”

“We leave for the Acropolis in ten days. My responsibilities are about to increase tenfold. There will be rare times, like when you are in trainings for your element, for example, that we are separated. I need a way to contact you, at least until the rest of the Marks are in place,” Theon explained. He held it out for her again, and she tentatively reached for it, immediately setting it down on the table in front of her. “I got a case and screen protector for it,” he added, at her reluctance to hold it. She nodded in acknowledgement.

Theon rubbed at the back of his neck. Why did this feel so…awkward? Most Fae had phones once assigned to their kingdoms.

“Tessa, I’m not really sure why you’re so…” He couldn’t even think of the word to adequately describe how she was acting because he didn’t know. After nearly two weeks, he still could not read her even a little bit. He still knew nothing about her except that she hated socks and could find her way down from several floors above ground.

She didn’t answer him, just stared at the phone. He’d turned it on when he’d taken it from the box, having charged it all morning. He cleared his throat. “Right then. The passcode is your birthday. I figured that’d be the easiest to remember…” He trailed off

when she looked up at him.

“It’s a four-digit passcode.”

“Yes. Day and month,” he replied, even more confused now.

Tessa glanced back down at the phone before clearing her own throat. “I do not know the day I was born. Only the month and year,” she stated. Theon sat in stunned silence. “We do not celebrate our individual birthdays at the Estates,” she went on. “All birthdays of a particular month are recognized as one on the first day of that month with cake. So I know my birthday is in the fifth month and what year I was born, but I do not know the day.”

He had to take a moment before he was able to say, “Your birthday is the fifteenth day of the fifth month, Tessa.”

She only nodded before returning her attention to the window.

Theon reached over and unlocked the phone, opening up her contact list. “I already programmed my number, Luka’s, and Axel’s numbers into the phone. We are the only people I want you contacting. There is an enchantment that will send me a message anytime you use it to communicate with anyone other than me or if someone else attempts to contact you. All content is blocked, other than the things I downloaded for you.” Tessa nodded again, not even glancing at the phone. Not knowing what else to do, Theon kept talking. “I expect you to have your phone whenever I am not with you and to answer any time I call or

text.”

She nodded.

“I’m going to need verbal acknowledgement here, Tessa.” Mainly because he didn’t know what to do with her. Again.

“I understand the new expectations placed on me,” she said quietly, nudging the phone aside. “I need to use the restroom before we go.”

She looked at him expectantly.

“You do not need my permission to do so, Tessa. Certainly not in our own rooms.”

“Your rooms,” she corrected so quietly he almost didn’t hear her.

He reached over and gripped her chin, drawing her eyes back to his. “I don’t like this, Tessa. I don’t like…” He trailed off when she seemed to stare right through him. “Grab a sweater in case you get cold in town,” he finally said, releasing her chin.

She nodded, standing and disappearing into the bedroom. She’d left the phone sitting on the table, and he still could not figure out her odd reaction to it. He was no closer to understanding her than he was when she’d waved chocolate in his face.

He was still contemplating it when Axel and Luka returned a few minutes later, and just as Theon was about to go check on her, Tessa came back from the bedroom. She had a white cardigan over her dress, and she’d grabbed a small gold purse as well. Theon swiped the new phone off the table and handed it to her, and she immediately slipped it into her clutch without a word.

“Are we ready?” Luka asked, holding the keys to their usual vehicle.

“I think so,” Theon answered, bringing his hand to Tessa’s lower back to guide her forward. Axel and Luka bantered back and forth about the Chaosphere teams and the season that would start in the next week. Theon had never really understood why they cared about such trivial things like sports, especially Chaosphere.

They were just reaching the main foyer when his father’s voice called out to them.

Tessa went rigid beside him, and he heard her suck in a sharp breath. He slid his hand from her back around to her hip, tucking her into his side.

The males all turned to face the Arius Lord as he descended a set of stairs that led up to his study, Eviana falling from his side to a step behind him. He came to a stop before them, and they all bowed their heads in greeting, Tessa keeping her eyes fixed on the marble floor.

“Where are you three off to?” his father asked.

“I have some errands to run. I trust you saw the additions to the Acropolis agenda?”

Theon answered. “Luka and Axel are just along for the ride.”

“You’re not going all the way to Rockmoor?” Valter asked, his phone in hand as he thumbed his screen, not bothering to look at them.

“No. Just into Castle Pines,” Theon answered. “We will be home in plenty of time to get ready for dinner.”

“See that you are,” Valter said, his eyes lifting to Tessa in a way that made Theon want to shove her behind him. He nodded once to Theon, before turning and striding off, murmuring softly to Eviana, who had moved back to his side.

Theon ushered Tessa quickly out the door and down the steps, opening the back door of the vehicle and helping her into the backseat. Shutting the door, he turned to go around to the other side and nearly ran directly into Luka’s chest.

“What did you do?” Luka demanded in a harsh whisper.

“Exactly what I said I was going to do,” Theon answered, glaring as he put some space between them. “I ensured she never tries to run again.”

“By taking away the little control she had? You, of all people, should know how quickly a person snaps when they have no control.”

“No,” Theon ground out. “As soon as she accepts the bond, I’ll ease up on her. I need her to see how bad it could be so she’ll appreciate the way it can be.”

Luka scoffed. “That will never work.”

“Then what, exactly, do you suggest?”

“Are we going or what?” Axel called, standing on the running board to look over the top of the vehicle at them.

“We’re coming,” Luka yelled back, but before he moved to get in, he pointed a finger at Theon. “This is going to bite you in the ass, Theon. Mark my words.”

He sidestepped him and climbed into the driver’s seat, leaving Theon to go around the vehicle and climb into the backseat behind Axel. Tessa had her clutch lying in her lap and was looking straight ahead. He could only assume she hadn’t spoken to Axel.

Between the conversation this morning with his father and the confrontation he’d just had with Luka, he wanted her right beside him. Her presence was soothing, and her touch eased the constant tension in his chest. He could say the tension was from the Source bond, but the truth was that tightness had been there long before he found himself with a bonded Source. Reaching over, he grabbed her hand and tugged her towards him. He knew he was a bastard for it. This wasn’t a power play or to show her he was in charge. This was him wanting comfort simply by touching her because somehow he could breathe easier when she was close.

She slid across the seat wordlessly, and Luka glared at him in the rearview mirror.

Tucking her into his side, he pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head. He may have been a bastard for what he was doing to her, but for the drive to Castle Pines, he let himself forget about it all. He let himself forget she was his Source, and he was her Master. He let himself forget about his father’s plans and his own plans. He let himself forget he was the heir of the Arius Kingdom and that she was forced to be by his side.

He let himself forget he was more like his father than he cared to admit.

Theon stood in his bedroom, sipping on the glass of liquor in his hand as he watched the female on the balcony. She sat on one of the balcony sofas, her knees pulled to her chest and a blanket wrapped around her, cradling a cup of tea in her palms.

She had been the portrait of obedience in Castle Pines, never straying from his side.

She’d been utterly flawless in public, just as he’d told her she needed to be. When they spoke to her, her responses remained as few words as possible, even with Axel and Luka.

He knew they were unhappy with the situation by the glares they threw at him all afternoon.

Axel had tried to get her to go with him a few times, but she had shaken her head or politely

declined, staying right by Theon’s side. She’d acted like Eviana. Like a Source would be expected to act. It was what he’d demanded of her, so why was he hating every godsdamn second of it?

One of his stops had been to take Tessa to get a laptop and tablet. She would need them for her various training sessions at the Acropolis. While she wouldn’t need to attend all the trainings the other Fae would go through, she would have to attend some of them. In addition, she would be attending various meetings and events with him. He needed her to have access to various information.

He had asked her to pick out the ones she wanted. She had scarcely glanced at the display models before saying she was sure he knew which were best while she stood with her hands clasped in front of her. He’d ended up just getting her the top of the line devices.

Over the next few days, he would put the same blocks and enchantments onto them as he’d done with her phone before giving them to her.

When they’d arrived home and made it back to their rooms, he’d told her she could change into more comfortable clothing until it was time to get ready for dinner, but she’d declined, only removing her shoes. She’d asked if she could make a cup of tea and sit on the balcony. When he’d tensed at the mention of her escape route, her shoulders had curled in.

“I understand,” she’d said quietly, moving to fill the teakettle with water.

But when her tea was done, he’d taken her out to the balcony himself and sat opposite her. Eventually, he’d gotten up to get his own drink and had left her to her thoughts. It wasn’t as if she was speaking to him anyway. He had stayed where he could see her the entire time. He knew she wasn’t happy, but she did seem…more settled after being out of their rooms for a while.

Now, however, he would need to interrupt her thoughts because she needed to get ready for dinner. He’d already laid out a black, flared cocktail dress with small hollow cut outs at the waist. She would look stunning in it like she did in everything else, but his mind kept conjuring the image of her in his shirt this morning. He found he much preferred that look on her— the messy hair, just woke up and hadn’t had her coffee yet, simple and relaxed look. And yeah, her in his shirt, covered in his scent after sleeping beside him all night didn’t hurt either.

Theon knocked back the last of his drink, setting the glass aside before walking back out to the balcony. He came to a stop beside her, reaching out and running his fingers along her hair and down her jaw. The bond tingled with satisfaction, sending a rush of desire through him. He’d promised her he wouldn’t force anything on her physically—and he wouldn’t—but fuck. He wanted to kiss her when she turned her head to look up at him expectantly, waiting for his next order.

True to his demands, she hadn’t pulled away from his touch all day, and it had been pure bliss for the Source bond. He craved the day she didn’t pull away because she didn’t want to pull away almost as much as he was craving a taste of her lips right now.

He swallowed down his desire, and when he spoke, his voice was raspy and heated, “We need to get ready for dinner.”

Tessa nodded once, then stilled again. Waiting, he realized. She was waiting for him to remove his hand so she wouldn’t be pulling away from him.

He sighed, taking a seat beside her on the sofa. He took the mug from her hands, setting it on the table. “Tessa, can we talk?”

Her gaze met his, and he wanted to curse the gods at the lack of any type of storm in her grey eyes. “I don’t get such choices anymore,” she replied quietly.

Theon blinked. Those were the most words she’d said at once to him since this morning. Quickly shoving his surprise aside, he said, “I don’t want it to be like this. Not here. In our own space.”

Her lips thinned, and she broke his stare, fingers fiddling with her blanket. “Perhaps you can let me know how I need to adjust my behavior in your rooms tomorrow, but I really don’t know that I can handle any additional expectations today.”

“Tessa—”

“I need to get ready,” she said, pulling the blanket from her lap and draping it over her arm. She stood and picked up the book and mug, carrying everything back into the bedroom with her.

Theon leaned back on the sofa, scrubbing his hands down his face.

Tomorrow.

He’d try again tomorrow. Tonight, he just needed to get through this dinner, and hope she could hold it together in front of his father. He wasn’t sure he could stay his hand a second time.

An hour later, they were on their way down to the dining room with Axel and Luka. Tessa had pulled her hair up in a classic knot at her nape, leaving strands of honey-gold hair around her face. His hand was on the small of her back, and his fingers grazed the slivers of bare skin along the hollowed out slits on the dress.

As they approached the doors, she slowed and fell into step behind him, just as he’d seen Eviana do hundreds of times. He stopped, turning to face her, but before he could say

anything, Tessa spoke first.

“I know what is expected of me.”

“Tessa—”

“Your father is waiting,” she interrupted, her eyes fixed on the floor.

“She’s right,” Luka said from behind them, and Theon clenched his jaw.

Turning, he nodded to the staff to open the dining room doors and entered to greet his parents.

The dinner was as all family dinners were. The air was filled with tension, and the conversation was dull. Tessa ate everything placed in front of her without fuss, sitting perfectly still. There was no fidgeting as there had been a few nights ago. No grumbling under her breath. He didn’t miss his father’s quick glances at her…or his lingering stares.

As dessert was being served, his father leaned back in his chair. “I must say, Theon, your Source is unexpectedly behaved this evening. I did not expect her to be broken so

easily. Your discipline must have been highly effective.”

“She is not broken,” Theon replied tightly, meeting his father’s gaze. “It has simply been a long day of adjustments.”

“Call it what you want,” Valter shrugged, taking a sip of his drink. “You seem to mistake me for condemning you. I’m impressed, Theon. I didn’t think you had it in you to instill such submission.”

Theon’s fingers tightened around his drink, his knuckles turning white. Axel was giving him a knowing look across the table that seemed to scream, ‘I told you that you sounded like him.’ Luka was sipping his own drink, his sapphire eyes on Tessa, whose attention was firmly fixed on her crème caramel.

“Seeing you take such control of your Source eases some of my worries about our plans while you are away at the Acropolis,” his father continued.

“Please don’t speak of the Acropolis,” his mother interrupted, her lower lip trembling dramatically. “I’m trying to forget they are leaving in ten days.”

“For the love of Arius, Cressida,” Valter grumbled. “They will be home on various breaks and on holiday. It is not as though they are leaving forever. Soon enough there will be a new little heir for you to dote on.”

Tessa stiffened imperceptibly beside him, and Theon reached over, placing a hand on her knee beneath the table. Her eyes flicked up to him for the briefest of moments before returning to her dessert. The rest of the talk around the table was idle chatter, his mother evidently content to imagine life with a grandchild running around this huge house.

As soon as dessert was cleared, Theon stood. Luka and Axel did the same, saying good night to his parents. He nodded at Tessa to follow, and the moment they rounded the corner and were out of sight of the dining room, he reached behind him and pulled her into his side, pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head.

“You were perfect tonight, beautiful,” he whispered into her hair. Tessa said nothing, but he could see thin pools of silver in the corners of her eyes. “Tessa?”

“Walk with me, little one,” Luka said, coming up beside them and holding out his arm to her. She glanced up at Theon, clearly asking permission. He didn’t want to, but he nodded, releasing her to loop her arm through Luka’s and let him lead her down the hall.

“How are these new expectations working out?” Axel asked, the sarcasm thick as he came to Theon’s side.

Theon shot him a bland look. “It’s only for a bit. Just until she accepts the bond,” he insisted as he watched Luka and Tessa disappear around a corner.

“And if she doesn’t accept the Source bond?”

“She will.”

“When? After you’ve shaped her into—”

“Axel,” Theon interrupted, rounding on his brother. “I am doing the best I can with a situation none of us anticipated, and something neither you nor Luka seem to understand.”

Axel shoved his hands into his pockets, the muscle ticking in his jaw a mirror to Theon’s. “She won’t be the same at the end of this.”

“Of course she will. I only need her to be this way around others. It just needs to be an act. When it’s just us in private, she can be herself,” Theon bit back. “This is temporary.”

“She won’t be the same, Theon,” Axel repeated, shaking his head as they began moving down the hallway again.

“And what makes you so sure of that?” he asked, not bothering to hide his growing irritation with this conversation.

“Because you are different. When you started acting to appease Father, I told myself it was only temporary. I told myself you would go back to normal soon, but you didn’t, Theon. You are not the same.”

“Neither of us can stay the same after…”

“I know,” Axel said, reaching to stop him from opening the door they’d come to. “I know why we are the way we are, but that doesn’t mean we have to create more of us.”

He pushed the door open, and Theon followed him into the suite. Tessa was standing near the bay window, looking out at the dark grounds. It had started raining again, this strange weather pattern appearing to continue. They didn’t get much rain in the mountains at the end of summer, but at least this was a steady drizzle rather than a storm.

“Are we playing cards or something tonight?” Axel asked, stretching his arms up before pulling his dress shirt from his pants. He slid his jacket off, tossing it on the sofa, and loosening his tie.

“Sure. I’m just going to change,” Theon answered. He crossed to the bedroom, motioning for Tessa to follow when she glanced at him.

As they stepped into the dressing room, he turned to her, caging her against the wall

between his arms.

“What are you doing?” she gasped.

“Can I kiss you?”

Her eyes darkened some, her features hardening. “That’s not my choice.”

“It is,” he replied, reaching behind her to pull pins from her hair. “I told you I wouldn’t force anything on you, but today was intense. I know it was a hard day for you.”

“How will kissing me change any of that?”

“It will appease the bond. Ease some tension,” he answered, pulling the last of the pins

free.

“I’d rather just change and go to bed.”

Theon tilted his head to the side, twining a curl around his finger. “Axel and Luka want

to play cards.”

“I don’t want to play cards.”

“You can’t be in the bedroom by yourself, beautiful.” His other hand dropped to her hip, tugging her into him, and she sucked in a sharp breath.

For a long moment, she held his gaze, and Theon held his breath, waiting for her answer.

“I’d like to change,” she finally said, breaking his stare.

“All right.”

Theon stepped back, and she instantly wrapped her arms around herself.

He pulled out a pair of leggings and a tank top, adding one of his own thermals to the top. “In case you’re cold,” he said when she looked at him in confusion.

She nodded, moving forward to grab the clothing and retreating into the bathroom.

Theon changed in the dressing room, giving her plenty of time to get changed in the other room. When he came out to the bedroom, she was sitting in front of the fireplace.

“You don’t have to play cards, but I can’t have you in here by yourself,” he said, holding a hand out to her.

“I understand,” she answered, reaching out and letting him pull her to her feet.

He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, searching her eyes. “Tessa,” he breathed.

“Just accept the bond. This can all stop.”

“Do you think I’m not trying?” she asked, her voice cracking the slightest amount, but he heard it. “Do you think I do not recognize how much simpler things could be? Do you think I enjoy the agony that comes from not fully submitting to this?”

“What is holding you back? What do I need to do? Tell me, Tessa. Name it, and it is done,” he said, his hands framing her face.

She stared back at him, and for just a second, the façade slipped. He saw so many emotions swirling in her eyes, but there was something else there too. A flash of something.

Before he could study it more, she blinked, and her newfound docile demeanor was back in place. The only sound was the soft pattering of the rain outside as they stared at each other.

“You’ve done enough,” she finally said. “Please just let me figure it out on my own.”

She pulled free of him and walked out to the main room. When Theon followed, she was already curling up in the bay window, staring out at the raindrops trickling down the glass. Luka was bringing her a blanket while Axel was shuffling cards at the table.

They hadn’t even completed two hands when her breathing shifted. Theon glanced over to find her sleeping, her head propped against the glass.

“She was exhausted,” Luka said, dealing the next hand.

“It was a long day for her,” Theon confirmed. “A lot of adjustments.”

“I told you on the drive here that this would break her.”

“She is not going to break,” Theon ground out. “I just wish I knew what was holding her back from accepting this.”

“It’s who she is, Theon,” Luka said. “The sooner you accept that, the easier this whole thing will become.”

“I don’t know how many times we are going to have this conversation, Luka,” Theon snarled. “We cannot undo this. The only thing that can break the bond is death.”

“Would you undo it?” Axel suddenly chimed in. “If you could go back and change things, would you? Would you pick a different Source?”

Theon looked over at the Fae sleeping in the window. A female he’d only known a handful of days, but the mere idea of her not being here made him irrationally angry. Maybe it was the Source bond. It didn’t really matter. He’d felt drawn to her the moment he’d stepped foot inside that alcove. Fuck, he’d felt drawn to her from the moment she’d become a possible Source option. Why else had he refused to rule her out despite Luka and Axel’s very sound reasoning? He’d call it fate, but the Fates cared for their world as much as the gods did.

“No,” he finally answered, picking up his cards. “No. I wouldn’t pick someone else.

Because just like she believes, I’m a bastard, and I can’t let her go now that I have her.”